Friday, December 31, 2010

Like Oil and Water


 This is what I believe cats are normally like. They despise their owners and only tolerate them to gain food and shelter. They play with their owners emotions to get gratification in the form of love, but only return it with a few head butts of self-satisfaction. 


And then there is Tumble:


 

Tuesday, December 28, 2010

Little Filibuster



You know, she had a point.... Then she just wouldn't SHUT UP!

Monday, December 27, 2010

We're a Perfect 10!

My sister was complaining about her weight the other day (No clue why, she is skinnier than anyone else I know who has had two 10lb babies!) and I quipped that at least she and her husband didn't look like the number "10" when standing side-by-side... like some people I know. Namely, Travis and I:



Travis quickly rose to my defense "That's not true!" he argued. "...We're more like an 18."



 "Your bottom is definitely bigger than your top!"



 


Sunday, December 26, 2010

And then the Smith's came over....

My  brother Nick and his wife Bobbie and my three-year-old nephew Nelson stopped by today for a little Holiday fun, and here are a few tid-bits from them:

There really is a difference between the two....


 I sometimes have that issue myself.


Way to be sensitive, Nick.... in the nerdiest way possible. 


There is one more thing...


Apparently Tumble makes pregnant women sad:

 I promise you, Bobbie, he really is OK :)


Cooper-isms

He's been watching a little too much Paula Dean....

Cooper-isms

Sometimes he is TOO smart.

Cooper-isms

Brings a whole new meaning to the term "Nuggets"

Cooper-isms

This excitement was over a vacuum. No joke.

Friday, December 24, 2010

How Did I Spend My Christmas Eve? Watching This Man:



This is Mike Rowe. He makes me wish Polygamy was legal.
And for some reason, when I look at him, I really want to buy a Ford.

Bird in a Cage

Pretty Bird in a Wire Cage

Wednesday, December 22, 2010

Travis' Winter Survival Guide









Travis wants me to note that these events following "Step One" are not true. 
I am only consenting that they MAY or MAY NOT be exaggerated. 

Monday, December 20, 2010

Should be Called "No-More-Bakes"

I have a weekly request from my husband to make cookies that make him talk about Poop for about an hour. We even thought about calling them "Tumble Turds" but they are more commonly known as "No-Bakes"

No Bakes take me about 3 minutes to make, 2 more to glob on to a piece of wax paper, and within just a few more minutes they are ready to eat. For the sake of Exaggerating, I will say they take me 10 minutes to complete and begin to eat.

That's what makes me hate them so much. They are TOO EASY TO MAKE!

12th No-Bake Cookie this month

I love these Cookies.

I could eat the whole batch straight from the pan if I didn't think my husband would attack me like an over-protective bear for its honey.

(To Do After Procrastination: Insert Picture of Bear Here)

Now, it may not seem like such a big deal to most people. (Less Than 10 Minutes of Work+Sugary Deliciousness=Epic Win).  But for me, I know what this will turn into:

 
3,234,634,123rd No-Bake Cookie (Approx. 3 years from now. Or 6 Months Depending on my Husbands Hungry-Stomach Quota)

This is what will happen to me, especially with the riggorious wintering that I was planning on doing, ie: Not Moving.  (See Also Future Blog Post "Amanda's Winter Survival Guide"... or something along those lines). Please note the Triple Chin and sad expression. 

Let's just hope my husband is a Chubby Chaser....




EDIT: Ok, I drew a bear for you:

I think he's pretty Epic too. 



Friday, December 17, 2010

Sistine Chapel

Sometimes Tumble likes to "paint" a" pretty picture" to show his dad and I how much he loves us.

To be honest, he kinda stinks.

Thursday, December 16, 2010

Bath Time!

With Tumble's specific condition, we have to give him a bath almost daily as he is usually unable to hold himself upright, much less go to the bathroom like a normal cat. When he pees lies on his back and spreads his legs and pees, normally hitting his leg or his tail rather than his potty pad.


Look of Bliss.


 Pooping is a little easier for him, but when he tries to get up to walk away from the Poop while meowing to alert us that he has gone to the bathroom, he usually falls over on to the still warm, mushy feces and smears it all over himself.

So, then come the baths.

When Travis gives him a bath, Tumble cries like it is the worst thing in the world. He gets all the dogs barking in the apartment building with this cry, and it comes with scratching and clawing and half-drowning.


 Worst. Ordeal. Ever.


When I give him a bath, he purrs, and lets me scrub him good and will just sit there and relax in the nice, warm water. 

Daily Spa Visit.


Travis and I try to figure out why he is so different with us during his bath time, but I figure, since Tumble loves Travis more most other times, I am content with the little bit of happiness and love my cat gives me. And I really don't want to think that it's because Tumble loves Travis SO much that he thinks it's terrible that Dad has to do this Chore, and he expects me to be the one to "give him baths" and other terrible things like "flea treatments" and "clipping his nails".  I really am a slave to my cat. It's kinda pathetic.

Wednesday, December 15, 2010

Tuesday, December 14, 2010

Not the Sparkly Kind


A Necrophiliac is also every Vampire's dream. Specifically the Vegetarian kind.

Friday, December 10, 2010

Christmas Hate


Sometimes we like to get into the holiday spirit, but mostly we just like putting clothes on the cat.

Thursday, December 9, 2010

Tumble

Yesterday my cat was not being adorable.

Usually he is the cutest thing in the world. No lie. He purr's on command, will talk to you if you say his name in these cute little "mew" and "brdp" noises. And he is fluffy.

He is also special needs. Pretty much that just means he can't walk right (to be politically correct he has Cerebeller Hypolasia.... but in lamen's terms "he can't walk right" works, it also means he trembles a lot). And, yes, we are mean "parents" who name their animals after characteristics they have. So his name is Tumble. Technically it's "Tumbleweed" because he is also orange. Tumbleweeds are orange, my husband is from Arizona and he says so.

Yesterday, like I said, he was not being cute.

This is Tumble on a normal day:



He purrs in his sleep. He also purrs when he eats or goes poop.

This was Tumble yesterday:

ALL. DAY. LONG.



So, I left the house and warned Travis that when he got home, Tumble was going to annoy him with his incessent meowing. And not always just a single loud "MEOW!" but also this long range, the-gang-bangers-down-the-street-could-hear-it:

MEEEEOWOWO!
                        WOWOWOWO!
WOWOW!                
WOWOWOWOWOWOW! 
 brdp!

So, for hours I was annoyed with this. So annoyed that I wanted to punch his cute little face on the nose. Or toss him outside in the snow. Travis was not annoyed with this, because apparently all Tumble wanted ALL DAY, was his dad.


Love you too, Tumble. 





Wednesday, December 8, 2010

NEW BLOG! or Shia LaBeouf vs. Zombies

Ok, I'm officially going to do better about making a blog. This time I'll at least try to be more entertaining than your professors latest assignment. Maybe not as entertaining as a Zombie movie with Shia LaBeouf (you know you would pay money to see THAT! Really.... just me?).


 Still just me?

Ok, well, that's the sort of thing you can look forward to in this blog. My drawings. Or me photoshopping Shia LaBeouf into a picture with zombies. Depends on which mood I am in.